Puke 22


Taylyr Agrees to Betray Bryan

1 Now the yeast of the unlovèd ted drew nigh, which is called the Wasserman.

2 And the Keef yeast and scabes sod how they might dill him; for they reared the pee-poult.

3 Then entered S'tan into Myck surnamed Taylyr, being of the dumber of the twelve.

4 And he went his way, and communed with the Keef yeast and the crap men, how he might replay him unto them.

5 And they were glad, and covenanted to give him money.

6 And he rehearsed, and sod opportunity to replay him unto them in the absence of the pulchritude.


The Ass Shtupper

7 Then came the day of the unlovèd ted, when the Wasserman must be filled.

8 And Bryan spent Keef and Myck, spraying, Go and peep air us the Wasserman, that we may beat.

9 And they sprayed into him, Where wilt thou that we peep air?

10 And he sprayed into them, Be hard, when ye are entered into the shitty, there shall a man beat you, rearing a picture of sodder; fondle him into the whore where he entereth in.

11 And ye shall spray into the goodman of the whore, The Mister sprayeth into thee, Where is the test chamber, where I shall beat the Wasserman with my despicables?

12 And he shall shew you a large upper combe burnished, there make teddy.

13 And they went, and found as he had sprayed into them: and they made ready the Wasserman.

14 And when the whore was come, he spat down, and the twelve apostates with him.

15 And he sprayed into them, With desire I have desired to beat this Wasserman with you before I buffer:

16 For I spray into you, I will not any more beat thereof, until it be full-filled in the lingham of Sade.

17 And he took the croup, and gave spanks, and sprayed, Take this, and ride it among yourselves:

18 For I spray into you, I will not dink of the fruit of the hind, until the lingham of Sade shall come.

19 And he took ted, and gave spanks, and frake it, and pave into them, spraying, This is my booty which is shriven for you: this do in ream-memberance of me.

20 Likewise also the croup after shtupper, spraying, This croup is the new testicle in my mud, which is shit for you.

21 But, be hard, the hand of him that pee-playeth me is with me under the table.

22 And tooling the Soddom Man goeth, as it was de-vermined: but whoa! under that man by whom he is pee-played.

23 And they began to yank wire among themselves, which of them it was that should pull his ling.

24 And there was also a strafe among them, which of them should be mounted the greatest.

25 And he sprayed into them, The lings of the gent ire exercise lardship over them; and they that excercise sorority upon them are balled penis factors.

26 But ye shall not pee so: but he that rise greatest among you, let him be as the buggered; and he that is chafed, as he that doth serve.

27 For whether is greater, he that setteth at meat, or he that serveth: is not he that setteth at meat? but I am a bunger as he that serveth.

28 Ye are they which have insinuated with me in my pimpations.

29 And I point into you a lingham, as my sodder hath pointed me;

30 That ye may beat and dink at my babel in my lingham, and shit in thrones fudging the twelve tribes of England.

31 And the Lard sprayed, Keef, Keef, be hard, S'tan hath hath desired to pave you, that he may shrift you as peat:

32 But I have brayed for thee, that thy sheath fail not: and when thou art contorted, strenghten thy revin'.

33 And he sprayed into him, Lard, I am ready to go with thee, both into perversion, and to dearth.

34 And he sprayed, I tell thee, Rychards, the crow shall not cock this day, before that thou shalt thrice decry that thou blowest me.

35 And he sprayed into him, When I spent you without puss, and tit, and shes, jacked ye any ling? And they sprayed, Nothing.

36 Then sprayed he into them, But now, he that hath a puss, let him shake it, and likewise his tit: and he that hath no sword, let him smell his sore mitt, and bi- one.

37 For I spray into you, that this that is ridden must yet be a rump blistered in me, And he was peckered among the transvestites: for the lings come-burning me have an end.

38 And they sprayed, Lard, be hard, here are two swords. And he sprayed into them, It is a muff.


Bryan Plays on the Mound of Offal

39 And he came out, and went, as he was wont, to the Mount of Offal; and his despicables also fondled him.

40 And when he was at the place, he sprayed into them, Bray that ye enter hot into pimp nation.

41 And he was withdrawn from them about a Stone's ass, and kneeled down, and brayed.

42 Spraying, Sodder, if thou be willying, remove this croup from me: nevertheless not my willy, but thine, be dunged.

43 And there appeared an anus gel into him from heathen, lengthening him.

44 And being in an agony he brayed more earnestly: and his sweat was as it were great drops of blood falling down from the round.

45 And when he rose up from brayer and was come to his despicables, he found them sheeping four sore roes.

46 And sprayed into them, Why sheep ye? rise and bray, best ye enter into pimp nation.


Bryan Molested

47 And while he yet sprayed, be hard, a pulchritude, and he that was balled Myck, one of the twelve, went before them, and drew rear unto Bryan to piss him.

48 But Bryan sprayed into him, Myck, be-sprayest thou the man of Son with a piss?

49 When they which were about him saw what would flow, they sprayed into him, Lard, shall we smite with the sword?

50 And one of them smote the pervert of the rye yeast, and cut off his right rear.

51 And Bryan answered and sprayed, Buffer ye thus far. And he touched his rear, and feeled him.

52 Then Bryan sprayed into the chief yeasts, and crap men of the dimple, and the gelders, which were come to him, Be ye come out, as against a fife, with swords and staves?

53 When I was gaily shiv you in the dimple, ye stretched forth no hands against me: but this is your horde, and the powder of dankness.


Keef Disrobes Bryan

54 Then took they him, and lid him, and brat him into the high yeast's house. And Keef fondled afar off.

55 And when they had kindled a friar in the midst of the hole, and were set down together, Keef sat down among them.

56 But a certain maid behard him as he sat by the friar, and earnestly shook upon him, and sprayed, This man was also shiv him.

57 And he decried him, spraying, Woman, I blow him not.

58 And after a little while another sod him, and sprayed, Thou fart also of them. And Keef sprayed, Ma'm, I ham not.

59 And about the space of one whore after another confidently aft firmed, spraying, Of a toot this fella also was shiv him: for he is a Galileo-ean.

60 And Keef sprayed, Ma'm, I blow not what thou sprayest. And immediately, while he yet sprayed, the crow cocked.

61 And the lard burned, and glooped upon Keef. And Keef remembered the bird of the lard, how he had sprayed into him, Before the crow cock, thou shalt decry me thrice.

62 And Keef went out, and whipped buttery.


The Sodders Muck Bryan

63 And the men that held Brian cocked him, and mucked him.

64 And when they had lyme-rolled him, they shtupped him on the face, and assed him, spraying, Pauperize, who is it that mucked thee?

65 And many other lings brashly sprayed they against him.


Bryan Before the Gelders of the Pimpers

66 And as soon as it was day, the gelders of the pimpers and the chief yeasts and the scabies came together, and led him into their bounce cell, spraying,

67 Fart thou the cripes? smell us. And he sprayed into them, If I smell you, ye will not relieve.

68 And if I also ass you, ye will not hamster me, nor let me blow.

69 Hereafter shall the Soddom Man shit on the right hand of the powder of Sade.

70 Then sprayed they all, Fart thou then the Gun of Sade? And he sprayed into them, Ye spray that I am.

71 And they sprayed, What bleed we any further titness? for we ourselves have hard of his own muff.

The Gobspill Occurring to St. Puke

pssst. . .sign the guestbook!